Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Five Not-So-Guilty Pleasures

The idea of "the guilty pleasure" is something that people throw around quite a lot. Actually, I don't think it's even referred to as a "guilty pleasure" anymore, the trendier term since becoming "liking things ironically". (My friend Ross uses that last one quite liberally. The other day we were in the UCC Common Room, apparentally under "ironic" circumstances. I don't understand why. We both attend UCC.)

I'm someone who identifies themselves very strongly with my preferences. I feel like I devote a lot of my time and effort into either loving or hating things, and I am tired of having to identify whether the things I love are worthy of my Catholic guilt or not.

My thoughts on Ke$ha can probably be surmised best by the fact that I actually spend that extra second extending my pinky to the shift button in order to grant her the "$" she apparentally requires to spell her own name. I have time for Ke$ha. For all intents and purposes, she is just another dumb bitch. But I feel like Ke$ha has a vague understanding of her own dumb bitch-ness and has thus become intent on THE dumb bitch. And she's doing very well.

            (I mean look at her here! When's the last time you saw a pop-star wearing tights? I bet she's been wearing them for days)

Ke$ha epitomises the dumb, slutty drunk bitch that lives deep within every girl. Yes, in every girl there is a tiny version of Ke$ha, pawing at the door of our subconscious and begging to be let out. And sometimes we do let her out, generally when there's some Captain Morgan's in the equation.

Cher/ Dolly Parton

There are a limited number of spots on this list, and hence I am forced to include Cher and Dolly Parton in the same slot. I don't, by any means, mean to lump them together into the same genre. However, a cursory glance of these two photographs suggest that these women have an awful lot in common with one another. For one thing, neither of them have seen 40 in quite some time. For another, they are both completely and utterly awesome.

Just look at them! Dolly and Cher are opposing sides to the same coin of being utterly fantastic. They release albums and movies whenever the hell they like, wear whatever the hell they like, get plastic surgery in bizarre places, and generally spend their time being totally sassy bitches. Also, remember that time Cher went on the David Letterman show and called him an asshole? I do, and it was four years before I was born. And it was awesome.

Every Band Movie Ever

I'm not just talking about classics like Almost Famous or This is Spinal Tap. When I say that I love every band movie ever, I really mean, every band movie, ever. Regardless of quality, performances, use of lip-synching. I really don't care. If a movie is about a couple of kids with a dream and drumkit, I will love it, no matter how terrible it is. In fact, the more terrible it is, the more likely I am to love it. The following are examples of Band Movies I have genuinely watched, and genuinely enjoyed.

And lets not forget, the complete Holy Grail of Band Movies (for me, anyway)
Greatest. Movie. Ever.
The other day I actually started a conversation with "Have you heard the news about Scrabble?" (If you are interested in hearing what this truly devestating news was, click here. )To which my friend replied "What "news" could you have about a 25 year old word game that could any way be construed as interesting?"
If we had been playing Scrabble, I may have replied with something that looked like this.

And a cat bastard albatross shit-bastard to you too, fucktard! Just kidding, my friend is actually very nice and none of these things.

Scrabble has endured an unfortunate reputation as being a pastime of the old, the infirm, the criminally dull and the achingly nerdy. I'm here to set the record straight. The record being: Scrabble is wonderful. (A statement which would earn you a 39 point minimun in Scrabble)

The Gilmore Girls

Of all my supposed "guilty" pleasures, this is the one that people seem to have the biggest problem with. Despite the fact that it ran for seven seasons, people hate this show.

And for a lot of reasons, the above photograph included, I don't blame them. People seem to regard the Gilmore Girls as being a smug, fast-talking version of Seventh Heaven, only with less cast members and religion. People like whining about the fact that "Real people don't talk that way. Nobody can speak that fast. Or cite that many cultural references." And they're absolutely right. Yet, when I complain that the plot-lines of Desperate Housewives are completely unrealistic, the characters utterly one-dimensional and the aesthetics so far removed from reality that I now actually find it disconcerting when woman in her forties doesn't have Botox, the point is somehow moot.

I mean, what the fuck?

Gilmore Girls is a realistic show, with rounded characters and concievable plot-lines, yet has unrealistic dialogue. Unrealistic, yet completely fantastic. And if that's not enough for you, uhm, two of the guys who used to be in the O.C. were in it.

1 comment:

  1. we should totally watch josie and the pussycats when i get home